Mediation Resources

In addition to my articles on this site and blog posts about mediation, the following online information—all free — can be very valuable for mediation.    These include many of Bill Eddy’s articles on making proposals and negotiating.    The High Conflict Institute’s site is full of helpful articles, including:

Bill’s site:  Yes, no, or I’ll think about it (Making and responding to proposals)

https://www.mediate.com/articles/eddyB2.cfm

Making proposals and what’s in a proposal   https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/making-proposals

Don’t ask why the other party is proposing something.  This comes up all the time in family mediation.  I’ll bring a proposal from Party 1 to Party 2 and Party 2’s first statement is “Why would he do that?”  Then they try to analyze what Party 1 is thinking or doing.   That’s not important.  Trying to analyze a Party’s reasoning in making a proposal is a lot of speculation (usually wrong) and doesn’t move you closer to settlement.   https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/dont-ask-why-ask-whats-your-proposal

Bill has also written specific articles about mediating high conflict disputes:

https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/mediating-high-conflict-disputes-in-melbourne-australia

https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/high-conflict-mediation-4-tips-for-mediators

And the use of Empathy, Attention and Respect (EAR) applies in most mediations, but especially those that involve an unusually high level of emotions:  https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/calming-upset-people-fast-with-ear

Attorneys and mediators can benefit from concentrating on how to coach clients to make proposals   https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/coaching-clients-to-make-proposals

Overcoming the top 6 barriers to settlement is an important article for attorneys, as most of the “barriers” can be dealt with by an attorney with his client before the mediation starts.     https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/hci-articles/overcoming-the-top-6-unnecessary-barriers-to-settlement

Dealing with Difficult People  (free download)  https://www.pon.harvard.edu/category/daily/dealing-with-difficult-people-daily/  This report is from the Harvard Program on Negotiation and is a deep dive into negotiating with the most difficult of personalities.  If you’re an attorney and dreading a mediation or negotiation with someone you really don’t understand and who seems to be difficult for the sake of being difficult, this discussion and these strategies can help

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